I QUIT SMOKING

When I was a kid, I despised smoking. The cloud-like matter that billows the air suffocates me. I did not like the smell. I did not like the sensation as it hit my eyes. I told myself, I will never smoke in my entire life.

When I grew older, I started to make some changes. No! They were not at all planned. They were spontaneous. They just happened. Slowly, I came to adjust to the smell of cigarette smoke. At times, I would secretly puff one stick in the privacy of my room. Bu after that, I would cough. This would make me promise never to smoke again. But just like before, time and oft, i would find a leeway to puff just a tiny tiny single puff which usually ended in puffing the whole stick. Then, another promise would be made only to be broken after quite sometime.

When I reached College, I told myself "This time, i will not bother to even try to puff a cigarette." Indeed, I survived tertiary education without breaking my vow. It ran until I earned my master's degree.

When I started to work, I was not puffing cigarette. Until, one day, I puffed one. Hmmm, this time, I saw a purpose. Yep! It was soothing. Relaxing. De-stressant (my word). It was also a pasttime. I enjoy trying to form shapes of cigarette smokes. Besides, my friends smoke too. Into the circle. I was in the circle. Sad part, I also drink. But hey, I only smoke in the absence of my students. I smoke between 5 to 10 sticks a day.

Then there came last night, June 9, 2009 at past 11 in the evening. I gave my lighter (that yellow lighter) to the person I cared too much, I lost, and rekindled again. I promised never to smoke again. This is a vow I shall keep for the longest time. I swear I will not smoke again. I will resist the temptation at all cost because this time, I already know the essence and meaning of the word "promise".

This time, it will be for real.

Good bye cigarettes...