10.21.2008 in Graceland and in Bacon

October 22, 2008.. 2:34PM

Since probably after celebrating my 7th birthday, I stopped giving out parties. To me, it was just a waste of time and money. It is because usually I ended up inviting even those people who are not really close to me. This is on top of those my parents and even my sibling invite. Who cares if it is not their birthday. Besides, I will not dare to bar them from eating the food I have prepared for my birthday.

This scenario was somehow boring to me. I end up just looking at them while getting food from the table. Then they become mere faces to me. It was like I wanted the party to be over now. Suddenly, the consequence of this realization struck me. I need to stop giving party during my birthday. However, I should still celebrate it with only a few people personally hand-picked by me.

Yesterday was my 33rd birthday. I chose to celebrate it with my colleagues -- madz liza and sir myk -- at lunch time in graceland-sorsogon and with idol_john2x and jade in jade's place in Caricaran, Bacon, Sorsogon. To me, these four people are my closest friends right now. Tested by time. Honed by experience. Bonded by challanges and triumphs. Sealed by laughters and support from each other.

I have to admit that I also wanted to be with some other friends. But, I opted not to do so today. I only have one body and two opportune periods -- lunch and supper. Lunch was for madz liza and sir myk. Supper was for jade and idol_john2x. Anyway, I thought, I can still be with them, drink with them in some other time. I had to prioritize my picks. My apologies for this. You are all important to me. But sometimes one is forced by circumstances to make hard choices. This is one of them. I hope you understand.

Going back to yesterday, on my birthday, a lot of people greeted me a happy birthday -- through text, through Yahoo Messenger, through email, through friendster, through the radio. Unfortunately though because my cellphone got sick. It could not be turned on. So, I had to bring it to the repairshop this morning. As soon as it became well again, I received several text messages containing their birthday greetings.

Yesterday, too, I had my cake with candles. I had my wishes. We had simple food and drinks. Pictures were taken as memento. I was so happy. I never regret having made this choice.

I shall post some pictures hereunder. They shall speak for themselves.


I love madz Liza. I love sir myk. I love jade. And I love idol_john2x.
To the four of you, thank you so much for being with me on my natal day.
You made me so happy. I will not forget this. I hope our friendships will last forever.

I love you too dohdee, rommel and jasp. But I also love those who greeted me on my birthday. I thank you too for remembering me on such a very important day for me.

God bless you.
God bless me.
God bless us.
God bless our friendship.

with all my love and affection, I remain..
-=dragonfly=-


PS: BEE forgot again my birthday...

tanung sa bisperas ng birthday ko

ika 20 ng Oktubre 2008; 8:59 PM

siya ang tinuturing kong pinaka.close ko ngayon.

siya na laging laman ng isip ko.

siya na sa bawat sandaling dumadaan, laging umuokupa ng panahon ko.

siya na laging nagpapasaya saken.

siya na itinalaga kong kasangga.

siya na tagapagbigay ng galak sa aking puso.

siya na sa tuwi-tuwina’y nagpapalundag sa puso ko.

siya na sa lahat ng pagkakataon ay gusto kong

makasama

maka jamming

makausap

makahalkahakan

siya na nagbubuklod sa aking tagumpay at gustong makamit

siya na nagbibigay sa akin ng rason upang patuloy na magpursige

siya na sa likod ng aking kakulangan ay patuloy na umiidolo sa akin.

siya na gusto kong makasama sa aking kaarawan.

siya na sa kauna-unahang pagkakataon ay nagbigay sa akin ng rason

upang ipagdiwang ang bisperas ng aking kaarawan.

Bakit? Sapagkat sa araw ng aking bertdey, may iba pa akong kaibigan na aming makakasama.

Samantalang, ang pagdiriwang ko sa bisperas ay para lamang sa aming dalawa upang ipagdiwang namin ang simunpaang walanghanggang tunay na pagkakaibigan.

Subalit, bakit ganun? Ala siyang panahon. Sabi nya sya ay mag eenhasyo ng kanilang numero na kanilang ipapalabas bukas dun sa kanilang paaralan. Oo nga sana, napaka tama o balido ng kaniyang rason. Buong puso kong inunawa ang kaniyang dahilan upang di matuloy ang aking pagdriwang sa bisperas ng aking kaarawan.

Ok na sana ang lahat kaso ng ako ay nag internet, nakita kong banda alas dos ng hapon na siya ay nag iinternet. Banda alas sais sya ay nag iinternet. Hay, ano nga ba ang tunay na dahilan?

Ang tanong ko ngayon, siya ba ay karapat-dapat kong bigyan ng ganitong pagpapahalaga o hindi? Tama kaya ang naglalaro sa aking isip? Siya na mismo ang nagsabi — derechahan.. Honest to goodness.. Eto, ginagawa ko na.

Kung ako ikaw, ano ang gagawin mo sa ganitong klaseng kaibigan mo?

Salamat sa pagbasa ng aking blog. Maligayang bati na lang sa akin sa araw ng aking kapanganakan.

sa muli,

-=(dragonfly)=-

DERECHAHAN (di paliguy-ligoy)

Derechahan.. This is a term I have always been especially to people I do not have the consideration of whether my blunt words will hurt them or not. Ironically, when the person has a space in my heart, I do exactly the opposite of it -- paliguy-ligoy. It sounds funny somehow but this is me. Unless, of course, the one close to my heart asks me to be direct -- derecho.

Last night, I remember, I got hurt by a confusing text message I received regarding a certain information I asked. Kasi, di ba, I have always been very honest, sincere, truthful. Because of this, I am also expecting those dear to me to be the same way. Besides, if an information I am asking cannot be given to me, by all means, say so. I will not force anyone to tell me so. I respect that wholly.

Anyway, because of my doubt, I did not realize my mood changed. Even the way I texted changed. All I knew was that I felt hurt and deceived. Or, so I thought.. I tried to sleep so I could forget the little pain I was feeling, I was having. But, I could not. It disturbed me because such doubt shook my trust and confidence on the person.

So I decided to send a forwarded message. It said:

"It's hard to completely start trusting someone,
when everytime you are trying to,
they are starting to lie again to you..

.. What's the lesson?
Just listen, but don't bother believing.

'nyt.."

Then there was silence for about an hour. The little text repartee that we started stopped. Then later, I received a text message asking if I was still awake. I texted back flatly. No happy face. Just plain and simple direct to the point text message reply.

Two text messages after, that same message was sent back to me.

I replied, "I don't lie.. HOnest aq.. Sincere aq na tawo.."

Then another text came: "I just sent it back to you because I did not like it. My apologies.."

Then I said, "My apologies too. I had an ill-feeling to you a while ago."

A reply came: "just what I thought so.. I felt it through your text. It's mood changed.. why?"

I explained the conflicting information I got then there was the further explanation from the other end.

Another text message came in the vernacular: "Go to me straight. Don't use a forwarded message."

Then, I realized, this made things clearer for the both of us. This situation made us know each other better. We made a pact, a promise that we will strive to for a better way of giving information. Something that is precise, accurate, more descriptive.. clearly.. not going around the bush through certain vaguely made forwarded message.. It should be coming from the heart -- direct, honest, considerate, sincere, truthful..

Another good thing that came out of this situation is the fact that the two of us realized how much we value each other. How excited we are when we decide to meet on a particular day in a specific venue.. How happy we become when we are together.. We realized our commonalities, our values, our fondness for each other.. All of these make our daily lives complete.. The more that we started to appreciate ourselves, our hopes, our aspirations, our dreams.. We learned the essence of openness to one another; that effective communication can only be achieved when feedback is flowing freely without hesitation not for the purpose of putting one down but to make things easier to understand and to further know the importance of its reasons; why it happened that way..

We hope this connection will last a lifetime and we will be able to surpass all the hurdles that will come our way.. We fervently hope to continue to realize our importance to each other so we will not depart.. May God bless us always..


October 16, 2008.. 07:45AM..
--I love you always my dearest dragonfly --