DERECHAHAN (di paliguy-ligoy)

Derechahan.. This is a term I have always been especially to people I do not have the consideration of whether my blunt words will hurt them or not. Ironically, when the person has a space in my heart, I do exactly the opposite of it -- paliguy-ligoy. It sounds funny somehow but this is me. Unless, of course, the one close to my heart asks me to be direct -- derecho.

Last night, I remember, I got hurt by a confusing text message I received regarding a certain information I asked. Kasi, di ba, I have always been very honest, sincere, truthful. Because of this, I am also expecting those dear to me to be the same way. Besides, if an information I am asking cannot be given to me, by all means, say so. I will not force anyone to tell me so. I respect that wholly.

Anyway, because of my doubt, I did not realize my mood changed. Even the way I texted changed. All I knew was that I felt hurt and deceived. Or, so I thought.. I tried to sleep so I could forget the little pain I was feeling, I was having. But, I could not. It disturbed me because such doubt shook my trust and confidence on the person.

So I decided to send a forwarded message. It said:

"It's hard to completely start trusting someone,
when everytime you are trying to,
they are starting to lie again to you..

.. What's the lesson?
Just listen, but don't bother believing.

'nyt.."

Then there was silence for about an hour. The little text repartee that we started stopped. Then later, I received a text message asking if I was still awake. I texted back flatly. No happy face. Just plain and simple direct to the point text message reply.

Two text messages after, that same message was sent back to me.

I replied, "I don't lie.. HOnest aq.. Sincere aq na tawo.."

Then another text came: "I just sent it back to you because I did not like it. My apologies.."

Then I said, "My apologies too. I had an ill-feeling to you a while ago."

A reply came: "just what I thought so.. I felt it through your text. It's mood changed.. why?"

I explained the conflicting information I got then there was the further explanation from the other end.

Another text message came in the vernacular: "Go to me straight. Don't use a forwarded message."

Then, I realized, this made things clearer for the both of us. This situation made us know each other better. We made a pact, a promise that we will strive to for a better way of giving information. Something that is precise, accurate, more descriptive.. clearly.. not going around the bush through certain vaguely made forwarded message.. It should be coming from the heart -- direct, honest, considerate, sincere, truthful..

Another good thing that came out of this situation is the fact that the two of us realized how much we value each other. How excited we are when we decide to meet on a particular day in a specific venue.. How happy we become when we are together.. We realized our commonalities, our values, our fondness for each other.. All of these make our daily lives complete.. The more that we started to appreciate ourselves, our hopes, our aspirations, our dreams.. We learned the essence of openness to one another; that effective communication can only be achieved when feedback is flowing freely without hesitation not for the purpose of putting one down but to make things easier to understand and to further know the importance of its reasons; why it happened that way..

We hope this connection will last a lifetime and we will be able to surpass all the hurdles that will come our way.. We fervently hope to continue to realize our importance to each other so we will not depart.. May God bless us always..


October 16, 2008.. 07:45AM..
--I love you always my dearest dragonfly --